You're Not A Kid Anymore!

According to Jeff Foxworthy,
you're not a kid anymore WHEN...

• You can live without sex but not without your glasses.

• You quit trying to hold in your stomach, no matter who walks into the room.

• You enjoy watching the news.

• The phone rings and you hope its not for you.

• The only reason you're still awake at 4 am is indigestion.

• People ask what color your hair USED to be.

• You're proud of your lawnmower.

• Your best friend is dating someone half their age AND isn't breaking any laws.

• You start singing along with the elevator music.

• You really do want a new washing machine for your birthday.

• Your car has four doors.

• You routinely check the oil in your car.

• You've owned clothes so long that they've come back into style--TWICE.

• You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

• You consider coffee one of the most important things in life.

• 8 AM is your idea of "sleeping in".

• You don't remember when you got that mole...or the one next to it.

• You write thank you notes without being told.

• Neighbors borrow your tools.

• You answer a question with "Because I said so!"

• Others ask for your recipes.

• You start Christmas shopping in August.

• You paint walls for a reason other than getting your deposit back.

• You don't like to drive after dark.

• You say the words "Turn that music down!"

• You wear black socks with sandals.

• You point out what buildings used to be where.

• You know all the warning signs of a heart attack.

• You rake the yard without being told to.

• You can't remember the last time you lay on the floor to watch television.

• The service station attendant lets you pump your gas before paying.

Now tell the truth--aren't you OLD?

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